Czerwona sukienka.

Kilka dni temu oglądałam z Mikołajem film na Romance tv. Opowiadał o pierwszym świątecznym kazaniu pastora, a poprzez ten temat o problemach i uczuciach przypadkowo napotkanych przez niego w wieczór wigilijny ludzi. Było więc o pierwszych świętach po stracie kochanej osoby, po rozwodzie, po kłótniach, o tym, że jest to dzień, którego tak na prawdę ci ludzie boją się, unikają, udają, że nie chcą go celebrować. Zapomniałam polskiego tytułu tego filmu, żadne tam arcydzieło, ale świetny familijny film o rzeczach ważnych. Spłakałam się oczywiście niemiłosiernie, bo już tak mam. Ale oprócz tych wzruszeń zapamiętałam obraz głównej bohaterki, trzydziestoletniej porzuconej akurat przez męża matki kilkuletniej dziewczynki. Kobieta ta była ubrana w wieczór wigilijny w czerwoną, rozkloszowaną, sukienkę. Od tej pory ciężko mi myśleć o innej kreacji na ten wieczór. Wyglądała zjawiskowo i choć to raczej głupie, zespoliła się z otaczającymi ją w domu dekoracjami i światełkami. Dom i ona tworzyły nad wyraz spójny obraz. Taka spójność jest może estetyką głupców, albo kołtunów, jak pewnie powiedziałby Hłasko, ale bardzo mi tu odpowiadała. Czasem, wydaje mi się, że warto wprowadzić dookoła siebie spokój i porządek i nie powodować dysharmonii czy to detalami w innym kolorze, czy bałaganem, albo jeszcze inaczej niesnaskami wśród rodziny. Będziemy mogli wówczas odpocząć i może nawet poczuć błogość tej sytuacji, w której wszystkie nasze złości i problemy powinny spaść nam z barków prosto w maleńkie rączki pewnej nowonarodzonej dzieciny.
I jeszcze jedno, powieście na choince czerwone jabłko jako znak - symbol nadziei na odzyskanie raju.

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